ACTING ON MYSELF

We all know that acting is really good actually its a great talent not all of us have really so its really a nice thing to really have but everything have a good part and a dark part the good part if u really talk the acting as its a talent or just work in this way its really good and made a lot of money too and famous also so its great i think but its dark side is the one i really have this part is also a talent but its very bad one the worse actually which is acting on myself don't no its a gift or a course but its really very good in me i really do it in a very good way so hi guess i am talented in it i am really a professional in acting on myself and on stretching things up which i know that its really a failure ones and stretch them for a very very long way as if i am really enjoying that enjoying the bad things happening want them to happen to me longer and longer i think this is a sikic problem need really to be treated i know that very much its torchering yourself even if it hurts a lot but its OK don't know why do i take it really i talk to someone and i really know that this someone is not good with me and i will at at least be hurt by him but really i love to give it a try with the fact that i really know that i will be really hurt severely but i enter to get hurt as if i really have parts in me really have a place inside me which is really not hurt really i am full of scars but even if i still try to get myself killed i like the ones who really have nails to hurt me with as if i want to see someone very bad just to kill me a t once and relive me from all that i guess it around way to kill myself as if indirect u turn but without telling myself that i really do that i guess i really make fun of myself as i am committed suicide with someone else hands but really i couldn't keeping it from happening i really pushing myself to do it very much as if i am really a Coward to do this by myself as if i am with no arm to do so but i search for the hand that could do it ins tide of me am really sick person am i really need help if i really need i will not talk it don't know why but i will not really take it cause i am just fine its a talent i have i guess i will die with it its my weapon to die with