Very Sad Today

hi blogyi I am really sad today very sad my poor cat is really sick she has a hight temperature all night and shivering too, and she really don't want to eat a thing, I am very worried about her, I don't know,but I really think that she is dieing there, I really hope not cause I really love her very much,I took her to the doctor yesterday and he saw her and really gave her a lot of medicine, and I gave her the medicine with syringe but with no needle in it, but actually she cant swallow the medicine that good, and she is mewing in a very strange voice, as if she is crying or sad of something, I don't know, I really love that cat and hoping from all my heart that she will be well very soon, cause I will be very miserable if she died, cause I really think that she is the only creature that really cares about me, and really dealing with me in a very tender way, as if she really belong to me ,as if she is my own daughter, but I am really in a very bad mood ,cause she is laying there helpless under the blanket, I am really feeling that I am paralyzed seeing her suffering without having a single thing in my hand to do,I am really am helpless exactly like her, but after all i am not the one who is that ill so I am really not that happy with all of that its a weird beginning to a day but what should I do, I have nothing to do have no one to talk to have no one to cry in his arms, have no one to hold me, and tell me that everything will be good and fine but really I am very depressed and I am feeling very sad, I wish I could really vanish or just evaporate from every where, as if I don't exist as if I am some kind of air or some kind of nothing out there, I am really hoping this with all my heart, I really want that but the bad thing really that I couldn't do that even if I tried a lot , its out of my own hand but I am just hoping for that to happen, I just hope that my cat will be just fine, and well soon and also I hope not to lose her cause I don't have no one but her in my whole life, she is the only one who really care about me that much, and also I love seeing her around, so just pray for me that she will well, I am praying for that from the bottom of my heart, and hope that this could happen very soon cause I really need her to stay in my life, I have no one but her may be I am dumb or stupid but that what I am really feeling right now, and filling my heart with bitterness and misery